Moving in together can be an exciting adventure as a young couple – you get to spend more time in each other’s company, create your ideal home together, and support your partner on a day-to-day basis.
Moving in Together: Relationship Experts Give Their Best Cohabitation Advice
This adventure isn’t without its challenges though, both on a practical and personal basis. So, here are five key things to consider when moving in with a partner and how you can overcome the main challenges.
Splitting the bills
Moving in with a partner can mean joining your finances in order to afford a nicer place to live, whether that means a nicer area or bigger property.
You’ll probably pay for rent and household bills like water, energy, and tenants insurance together, so it’s important to discuss how you’ll divide this up. Many people prefer to split things 50/50 but there could be reasons why you’d prefer to do it differently.
Be mindful that imbalance in paying for household bills could result in resentment, especially if one person is consistently paying more when you agreed to split it equally.
The division of labour
Tackling the day-to-day household chores on your own can feel a bit overwhelming at times, so dividing up chores makes them that bit easier to deal with.
Feeling like your partner isn’t pulling their weight in the house can be a slippery slope to more serious disagreements. No one likes to feel like they’re nagging their partner, or that they aren’t appreciated or respected.
Make sure that both of you are happy with what chores need doing and communicate about when things should be done – a cleaning schedule can sometimes help.
Discussing the future
Cohabiting is a big step to take but it’s one that can usually lead down a path toward a future together. This can be an exciting prospect but potentially a daunting one as well.
Understanding what you both want from the future and how you’ll approach this together are discussions which probably need to be had before moving in together. Signing a rental lease and then realising you both want different things can be especially difficult.
Make sure you’re both on the same page when it comes to thinking about the future as a couple and consider how long you’ll live together before considering the next stage of your lives.
Handling any arguments
When living apart, you can retreat back to your own space after an argument in order to let your temper simmer. This allows you to think about things logically before making up with your partner.
That can be a lot harder to do when living with your partner, as you’ll naturally be around each other more. Shared spaces can make it more difficult to find space after an argument and your mood will have a greater effect on your partner.
Discussing how you’ll handle disagreements constructively and addressing issues before they blow up can help you to live together in harmony.
Establishing a Plan B
One of the major worries that couples can have before taking the leap into living together is what happens if things don’t work out.
This is a common worry, so you don’t need to necessarily think that it’s a reflection on how you think about your relationship – no one wants to end up in a bad living situation. A simple, respectful conversation about how you’ll address splitting up jointly owned belongings as well as finding alternative living arrangements can put minds at ease.
These points aren’t there so that anyone going into living together expects it to fail. Being mindful of each of these areas and talking about things before they become a problem makes it more likely that you’ll succeed in living together. Communication is crucial in a relationship, so discuss any concerns and be receptive to each other’s needs.